Wednesday, October 31, 2012

4 months!?!?!?

Yikes, the last time I logged in here to post anything was June 24th. That means it has been more than 4 months since I last posted. I guess when you feel awful for 21 weeks straight (including one visit to the ER for fluids), and then feel COMPLETELY EXHAUSTED for the next 2 months or so, that it takes its toll on one's motivation to blog. I typically blog during nap time, and until recently, nap time for the kiddos has meant nap time for me. I am a little less exhausted these days so I have thought more about blogging.  However, there were SOOOO many awesome things that happened since June 24th that I wanted to blog about and I felt like I had to go back and start with June 25th and catch up. But the number of "Oh! I need to blog about that!" posts kept piling up, and I began to feel like I would never again find the motivation to blog again, if I didn't just start. So, here I am starting again. I may on occasion try to go back and document (for Ryan's sake) some of those great outings/adventures, but if I don't get to it, that's OK too.

So, where does one start when they haven't blogged in over 4 months? I will say that pregnancy when you're not constantly sick is SO much more enjoyable! But man, even when I'm feeling well, its still so much harder this time than it was the first time. Getting up and down off the ground as many times a day as one does with a toddler (I'm a get down and play with my little guy kind of mom) is exhausting. And yet, there are still so many amazing moments that I just want to cherish forever. This little baby moves a LOT! I thought his big brother was a mover, but he had nothing on this kid. I hope that doesn't mean this little guy (yes, we found out its a boy!) will be a spaz when he comes out! No matter what, we'll love him to pieces! In fact, we already do! Every night, I try to lay on the couch for at least a few minutes in a particular position that always makes him move like crazy. I feel like this is our special time in which I can focus solely on him. Matt reads to my belly often, though, sadly not as much as we did with Ryan. (See above mention of exhaustion. Once the day ends we hit the sack and we're ready to go to sleep ASAP!) But the little guy does seem to respond when he hears his Daddy's voice, and that too is a special moment.

Already, watching Ryan as a big brother is a joy. He asks often (though not daily as he had been for a while) "When will Baby (insert name that we're not making FULLY public yet) pop out?" He now understands that Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas all have to happen before little brother makes his appearance. After today he can check one of those milestones off the list! Ryan has felt his little brother move a few times and now can often be found saying, "Look! I have a baby in my belly! Feel it!" He'll then have you put your hand on his belly and he'll jerk his belly out and say, "Did you feel him?!" I'm biased, I know. But its pretty darn cute! Ryan also incorporates his little brother into our day. If we do something fun sometimes he'll say, "Do you think Baby_____ will like going to the park, too?!" Or "Do you think Baby ____ will like fall festivals, too!?" I love that he already thinks about him and is making him a part of our daily life.

I can't wait to watch the relationship between Ryan and his brother develop. My two older brothers have a wonderful relationship. I am pretty certain they consider each other their best friends. And while that may not have always been the case growing up, they have always been close. I hope that Ryan and his little brother will be able to say the same when they're older. And, I hope that any other children we may have will benefit from their awesome relationship in the same way I have from my brothers' relationship. I am very lucky to have them both.

Well, that's enough of a start for now. Here's hoping you read a lot more from me from here on out (though, who are we kidding, come January, when the baby is due, I am sure we will have another long gap again!).

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Scary Mommy